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Thursday, April 29, 2010

Girl Talk Thursday: What’d you wanna be when YOU grew up?


Today on Girl Talk Thursday Diane from dashoff asks: What’d you wanna be when YOU grew up?

What did I want to be when I grew up?

What a loaded question. Maybe an easy question for other people, but never for me. I had convinced myself for years that I wanted to be a lawyer. I excelled at debate early on. I had a close cousin who is a lawyer. It was an desirable career. And thanks to feminism I could be anything I wanted to be right?

Except what I *really* wanted to be was a wife and mommy, and a stay at home one at that.. Which some how, in a feminist, girl power sort of world, was totally looked down on. With all this potential, all of the opportunity to do "great" things why would I want to settle for being a housewife. But for me it was never settling. It was like a secret thing I kept inside me until I was 17 or 18.

Then college rolled around. I started off in political science - the direction I was told to take if I wanted a good base for law school. I HATED it. The nagging desire to give in and be true to myself was pushing further forward. So I rambled around doing everything from retail to being an executive assistant until Bear and I got married and made the decision I should stay home. The kids were born and it was everything I hoped it would be.

Now as they are growing up, I start to wonder what I want to be as I continue to grow up. Really, while I think that I probably "should" go out and get a job, I love being home. Sure it is endless hard work. This past weekend was the first in over eight years I have had "off". But I am doing something I love, and the benefits package can't be beat.

And on that note, I am going to go snuggle with Indy, and read a book!

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, I know.

I work from home, so I get the stay at home part, but not really, because I'm always having to work, too. Today is my busy work day, which my son knows well. He is enjoying "his shows" while "MomMom works." It's not ideal, but it makes him happy and works for me (and my boss).

I love, though, that I can put my computer down to read a story, snuggle a kid, or fix a snack. It's really awesome.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I know.

I work from home, so I get the stay at home part, but not really, because I'm always having to work, too. Today is my busy work day, which my son knows well. He is enjoying "his shows" while "MomMom works." It's not ideal, but it makes him happy and works for me (and my boss).

I love, though, that I can put my computer down to read a story, snuggle a kid, or fix a snack. It's really awesome.

Michele in Progress said...

I should probably clarify that it isn't that I have an aversion to other people (mothers, fathers, CFers or whomever) having careers. I just totally never had that real call too. I have worked from home in the past, but it was work, not at all "what I wanted to be".

Cheryl said...

I think feminism is a woman's choice to do what she wants. Being a SAHM because you WANT to is total feminist, girl power! You said it best: you have to be true to yourself. I'm not sure it's possible to be truly happy if you're not.

Kisha said...

I couldn't agree more. I love being a wife and mom-the only reason I've been looking for more lately is because I know I'm capable and I love a challenge. I love the way you said it.

Diane said...

I agree with Cheryl -- If you love it, that is what matters! Don't let any weird ideas of feminism get you down. Feminism is about having the CHOICE. You aren't being forced to stay home, you're choosing it, and that's no less empowering than any other career path.

Brittany said...

I think being a mom and a wife was the only sure thing I knew I wanted to do as well.....and I completely remember the feeling of that not being something you shared too when someone asked you what you wanted to be when you grow up.

Malina said...

If you think YOU had it bad, imagine boys who wanted to grow up to run a household and raise children while their wives brought home the bacon. At least we women get a choice. Men still don't really. It has to be a valid choice for everybody. Men need a place in the womens' movement.

Mike's coworkers have asked him if I am coming back to work after the kid comes (I do, I think that being a working mom will make ME a better mom). But nobody has asked me if he is going to keep on working. They just assume he is. Even though just about everybody (especially his boss) must know that I make more money than him.

Julia said...

As a teen I never wanted to be a mom. That was just not cool in the 90's. I thought it would stunt my progress. Im so glad nature took over and I was blessed to know mother hood and how much it teaches me and helps me to grow everyday and brings out talents that I never knew I had.

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